Angry and Depression!!!

God love me, I know that :'(
A sudden vibration,
A sudden light on the screen,
A sudden worry,

I pick up my cellphone which is ringing,
Urging me to answer the call,
I was wondering why this cellphone number will show up again,
after so many years of resting
I press on the green button,
and the conversation started

Not quite a good conversation thou,
I'm not the Felix 3 years back,
I'm not like I was back then,
After the call,
I felt anger boil inside me,
I was really angry, down, depress and dissapointed,
I nearly shed a tear
but I didn't,
instead I let myself calm down,
and pray,
the next thing I open my eyes,
and I pick up the little daily devotion that is always available next to my pillow,
and I tap into the word of God,
I'm okey soon after,
i do not deny the fact that,
I'm angry, really angry,
and somewhat depress of "that person" behaviour,
I won't lend my hand to you,
because I won't be repeating the same mistake again,
I won't do what you want me to do,
I'm not doing thing agaisnt my will,
because God say
"fear not those who can only harm your body but not your soul"

I won't choose to hate you,
I never hate,
every thing is a new beginning,
what happen 3 years back is a history,
I won't hold any grudge,
I will pray for you,
I want you to turn to God,
and give up every thing you are doing now,
which will harm yourself,
I will continue to pray,
and one day,
if God's willing,
I will volunteer to bring you out,
and bring you to the side of our Savior

Anger is not going to get through me,
I choose forgiveness,
I believe that's what God want me to do,
I admit,
My heart is still painful,
is still hurt by your act,
God will heal me,
I believe that,
I know myself very well,
I can't hate you, because Jesus love you

Al rite, let's just leave this thing behind 1st,
I have my test to be worried about tonight,
God,
please heal my soul,
wipe away my anger,
guide me...
I believe in You
and also,
heal me from my illness,
I need to focus on my exam tonight,
thank you God,

I love you